Straight to the POINT

÷ UNTIL we agree to the EU’s Brexit deal, there will be no rain and the sun will keep shining.

MICHAEL ALBIN, Blackburn, Lancs.

÷ WHY the lettuce shortage? Because it’s far too hot for icebergs.

VINCENT HEFTER, Richmond, Surrey.

÷ MICHEL BARNIER, the great white shark, has been spotted in Spanish waters. Probably on his way to eat our fish stocks.

G. McKIE, Warrington, Cheshire.

÷ CONCERNS over the British temperature reaching 30c? I was teaching in an iron shed with no air conditioning when it hit 46.4c.

DENNIS FITZGERALD, Melbourne, Australia.

÷ HEATWAVE bonus: melting tar on our roads is helping to fill in the potholes.

DENIS LAMBERT, Longridge, Lancs.

÷ AFTER NHS England medical director Stephen Powis has weeded out ‘unnecessary’ operations, will he feel the same if he can’t sit down because of painful haemorrhoids?

E. JOHNSTONE, Brentwood, Essex.

÷ THE CO2 crisis has handed the Government a solution to the obesity problem on a plate: no fizzy drinks, beer or crumpets!

MAGGIE MARTIN, Downham Market, Norfolk.

÷ WHY did Austrian Grand Prix reports focus on Lewis Hamilton throwing his toys out of the pram rather than on winner Max Verstappen?

MONTY LOWTHER, Plymouth, Devon.

÷ THE BBC was considerate in rescheduling EastEnders at 9.10pm, giving me ten minutes after Coronation Street to put the kettle on.

P. WILSON, Chester, Cheshire. FOR permission to copy cuttings for internal management and information purposes, please contact the Newspaper Licensing Agency (NLA), PO Box 101, Tunbridge Wells TN1 1WX. Tel: 01892 525273. e-mail: copy@nla.co.uk