The billion-dollar Celebrity
Even boasting its own magic f lying carpet, this ship is excess all areas
THEY can’t build the ships fast enough. And it’s because a growing tribe treats cruising with a messianic devotion that’s bewildering to agnostics like me. Why can’t we just fly there, without thousands of other people around? What happens if you meet someone you want to avoid and keep bumping into them?
Celebrity Cruises’ latest ship, Edge, which had its inaugural sailing last week, is a billion bucks of ocean-going opulence intent on resolving this dichotomy — and capturing cruise sceptics by the boatload.
We’re taken on to the Magic Carpet, 90 tons of cantilevered platform the size of a tennis court hanging off the side of the ship, fulfilling different functions across 14 decks. It’s conveniently magicked itself into a bar, where I sip a glass of champagne with the ship’s Captain Costas.
The glitzy naming ceremony in the state-of-the-art theatre plays out like the Academy Awards for seafaring folk. Nobel laureate Malala Yousafzai, the inspirational young woman who confounded the Taliban’s decree of death, is here as the ship’s ‘godmother’. How her extraordinary journey has diverted down this side-road of champagne-toting, fired-up cruise fanatics isn’t clear.
The first cruise ship completely designed using 3D technology, it aims to re-interpret the white-starched pampering of an earlier era of ocean-going luxury, with art installations, innovative design and upscale restaurants.
Designer Kelly Hoppen’s beautifully conceived 1,467 rooms (176 of them suites within their own exclusive ‘retreats’) bear testimony to how effortlessly the design team — including Tom Wright, who is responsible for Dubai’s Burj Al Arab, and stylist Patricia Urquiola — seem to have found their sea legs.
High-tech is omnipresent, from facial-recognition boarding to controlling virtually every aspect of the voyage via smartphone.
At dinner, my misguided preconceptions are arrested on seeing Ben Fogle, Celebrity’s global destinations ambassador. He is curating on- shore experiences away from souvenir shops and towards his trademark adventures. The man who has visited 48 countries this year is off to Peru the next morning.
Me? I head in search of Eden, an impressive multi-deck lounge with the largest glass window of any ship (7,000 sq ft).
By the time I get there, a strange theatrical performance challenging categorisation is in full flow. Game Of Thrones meets David Attenborough under the influence of hallucinogenic drugs is my best shot.
At breakfast, Kelly Hoppen, who is also responsible for the two Iconic Suites — each 1,900 sq ft of billionaire-ready, outrageous opulence — and the sumptuous spa, doesn’t seem to have found much for the healthconscious to chew on.
We watch in silence as an overweight American waddles by, carrying a plate piled high with buffet booty and sporting a top proclaiming: ‘I HATE KALE.’
Established cruisers will adore this ship. And for newcomers like me, it’s a real eye-opener.