Daily Mail

Tricks to help you keep your promises

- Dr Max DrMax@dailymail.co.uk

January 11 — yesterday — was the day when, statistica­lly speaking, people are most likely to have given up on their new year resolution­s.

From a psychologi­cal perspectiv­e, this make sense. The human brain doesn’t like change. Most of us can make temporary lifestyle changes for a week or two but, after that, maintainin­g something so that it becomes a habit requires very deliberate and conscious effort.

Just how long it takes varies widely according to different studies. In the Sixties, american cosmetic surgeon Maxwell Maltz, the author of the bestsellin­g Psycho- Cybernetic­s, which detailed a system of ideas he claimed could improve one’s self- image, propagated the idea that it took 21 days to create a new habit.

More up-to-date studies suggest it’s a good deal longer — on average 66 days, say researcher­s at university College London. Which makes it all rather daunting and, some might feel, pointless.

But I urge you not to give up! There are several psychologi­cal techniques which will help you stick with your resolution­s, and top of the list is Cognitive Behavioura­l Therapy. CBT is precisely targeted at changing thinking and behaviour. It challenges the tricks our brains play on us to get us to give up on something new and revert to the comfortabl­e status quo.

Being mindful of these ‘cognitive errors’ will help you to identify them when they occur and overcome them. So, here’s my simple guide to using some CBT principles to make the changes to your life that you want for 2019.

STay focused, even if it means sticking with just one resolution. Don’t try to change several aspects of your life all at once, as that’s a surefire way to fail.

Break your resolution down into small, manageable goals. We all have an innate tendency to ‘catastroph­ise’, so one small setback in a new regime — whether it’s diet, fitness, giving up alcohol, quitting smoking, reducing screen time or whatever — becomes a reason to pack the whole thing in. Think of a series of steps leading to your goal, rather than focusing on the goal itself.

STay motivated by writing a list of the positive changes your resolution/ s will bring to your life. It will also remind you why you wanted to make changes in the first place. read through your list when you have moments of weakness.

reWarD yourself along the way. Small treats are a more effective motivator than promising yourself a big reward at the end.

reMeMBer that it’s Ok to fail and it’s inevitable that you’ll slip up. use it as a learning experience. Try to understand why you did it and what strategy you might adopt to avoid it next time.

keeP a diary of your progress. This will help counteract a phenomenon known as ‘discountin­g the positive’, which is when we persist in negative beliefs about ourselves and our abilities while ignoring the positive achievemen­ts in our lives.

keeP your emotions in check. ‘emotional reasoning’ is when we make assumption­s based purely on how we feel rather than facts. For example, ‘I feel scared about stopping smoking, so therefore I’m not going to succeed.’ Or, ‘The thought of losing weight makes me feel stressed, so I’m going to fail.’ remind yourself that there is no logic to such beliefs.

n TeLL someone what you are doing. no one likes to be seen as a failure and we are much more likely to make lasting changes if we’ve shared our atempt with family or friends. They can give support and make us feel accountabl­e to someone else should we find ourselves tempted.

and if you feel you need extra help, Public Health england and the nHS have joined forces to help people struggling with motivation via an an online quiz, the How are you? quiz , that offers tailored support. Go to nhs.uk/ oneyou/how-are-you-quiz.

If January 11 was the day that your good intentions foundered, then today is the day that you start over!

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