Westminster wars

ToRY pro-eU defectors Anna Soubry, Heidi Allen and Sarah Wollaston call themselves The Three Amigos. How very european. Why not the Three Unwise Monkeys? Because in trying to destroy the Tory Party, they see evil, hear evil and talk about evil where there is none.

DEFECTOR Heidi went all Motown, saying: ‘ I’m so excited.’ A tribute, perhaps, to The Pointer Sisters whose hit, I’m So Excited, contains the refrain: ‘I’m so excited, I just can’t hide it. I’m about to lose control and I think I like it.’

ONLY 32 per cent of MPs are women, yet they make up 64 per cent of this week’s defectors. Proof that while men just sit and gripe, women are the gender of action — or most prone to disloyalty?

I FEEL very sorry for Labour MP Luciana Berger, whose noble decision to resign after years of vile anti- Semitic abuse has been overshadowed by a bunch of archRemainers intent on stopping Brexit.