AND FINALLY

True grit is what keeps us going on

LAST week I confessed I felt down: worried by a personal problem to which I could see no easy answer. You responded with some of the kindest, warmest, most helpful emails I’ve ever read. Thank you so much.

It reminded me (yet again) of just how miraculous the power of human beings to inspire each other is. I believe this is, in part, how this column works.

That thought was also in my mind at the spectacular Daily Mail Inspirational Women Awards ( supported by Swarovski) last week.

I hope you read about the five finalists in Femail Magazine (March 7). Seeing them in person at the event, and hearing their stories of endurance, moved me to tears. And yes, it did put any problems I may have in perspective.

In his speech, our Editor Geordie Greig said that the stories of Victoria Azubuike, Lisa Wells, Eileen Chubb, Liz Rotherham and winner Lorraine Jones all demonstrated ‘adversity turned into triumph’.

He pointed out that what the five women’s very different stories had in common was ‘grit, determination and an ability to move forward’.

When you think of it, there no other way to achieve the alchemy of a bad thing turned into good, like base metal into gold. Nothing but picking yourself up off the floor, taking those stumbling steps and putting distance between yourself and despair.

Of course, if you’re in luck there may be a helping hand to grasp. That’s what we all hope for, whether the verbal encouragement/practical assistance comes from family, friend, counsellor, stranger (like me) or priest.

But what if there is no hand to grasp? What the five finalists last week all shared was sheer defiance. Faced with a situation they disliked intensely or which caused them intolerable grief, the response was to pick up invisible boxing gloves and square up to fate — Pow! Oh, nobody says that’s easy. But never believe it’s not possible.

Bel answers readers’ questions on emotional and relationship problems each week. Write to Bel Mooney, Daily Mail, 2 Derry Street, london W8 5TT, or email bel.mooney@dailymail.co.uk. Names are changed to protect identities. Bel reads all letters but regrets she cannot enter into personal correspondence.