Ephraim Hardcastle

THE Duchess of Cornwall, visiting tiny Nevis island yesterday with Prince Charles, asked to visit the Hermitage Plantation Inn, the oldest wooden house in the Caribbean. Awkward for Charles because just next door, down a dusty road, is the equally idyllic Montpelier Plantation where Princess Diana had one of her happiest holidays, with William and Harry, after her separation in 1992. Perhaps that explains why Charles did not accompany Camilla on her outing. CHARLES and Camilla arrive in Cuba on Sunday where the late dictator Fidel Castro was a fan of the Queen, according to my colleague Robert Hardman. He reveals in his book Queen Of The World that one Commonwealth PM wanted to ingratiate himself with Castro by declaring a socialist republic. ‘Why?’ asked Castro. ‘Does the Queen interfere?’ ‘No,’ the PM replied. ‘Then why would you do that?’ scoffed Castro. ‘You want to be a big tourist island and she’s good for showing off your stability. Why are you doing that?’ The plan was dropped. BESIEGED Theresa May might have been cheered by yesterday’s reaction of French state radio to her Downing Street address, saluting her ‘Churchillian tones’, ‘well-choreographed moves’ and ‘coup de théâtre’. But then the French do admire leaders such as Napolean and De Gaulle who go over the heads of parliaments. DESCRIBING the fitness regime of husband Harold Evans, Tina Brown, 65, pictured, says: ‘Every day he has his swim – 30 or 40 lengths. It’s incredible, he’s 90!’ She adds: ‘ Thirty- five years after we married, he’s still my favourite dinner partner.’ Heartening to hear life with blonde bombshell Tina is keeping the old boy young! LABOUR justice spokesman Richard ‘Headbanger’ Burgon – he once performed with rockers Dream Troll – is speaking at the World Metal Congress this weekend. Fellow panellists include the singers from Napalm Death and Temple Of The Absurd. Sounds like a typical Shadow Cabinet meeting. ULTRA Brexiteer Charles Moore, welcoming Tate Britain’s exhibition of Van Gogh’s time as a schoolmaster in Ramsgate and Isleworth, wonders: ‘If only he had stayed, perhaps he could have settled down to writing and illustrating school stories instead of painting all those sunflowers, cutting off his ear and dying in poverty.’ He spoils the daydream by commenting on the gallery’s description of Van Gogh as an immigrant: ‘No doubt the Tate wants to put Vincent down as a Remain voter.’ LADY Antonia Fraser has trumped Gyles Brandreth’s boast that he met TS Eliot and Charles de Gaulle by bragging that she met and danced with Eliot as well as the then US vice president Lyndon Johnson. ‘Away we whirled,’ she tells The Oldie. ‘I think Mrs Lady Bird Johnson looks absolutely lovely tonight,’ I whispered. ‘Yah do, do yah?’ said the vice president extremely loudly. After that, we completed the dance in silence.’ Yee-haw!