BY THE WAY... JUST ASK PATIENTS WHAT THEY WANT TO BE CALLED

A HIGH COURT judge recently made an excellent point when he requested that an elderly patient with dementia be referred to in court as ‘Mrs’.

Mr Justice Hayden told lawyers: ‘ I profoundly dislike the way hospitals infantilise senior citizens by referring to them by their first name.’

The way we address people really does matter. It doesn’t only signal respect — or lack of it — it can also be key to a patient bonding with those who are treating them.

I recall the time when my grandmother was in hospital suffering a fractured hip. When I visited, the nursing staff explained their concerns that she seemed rather deaf as she often failed to respond when they called out to her.

It was immediately apparent when I was accompanied to her bedside that the staff were addressing her as Mabel. That was indeed her name, but for 90 years she had been called May, which explained why her responses were rather patchy.

It is true that our culture has changed and, while the judge is addressed as the Honourable Mr Justice Hayden, reflecting the respect with which he must be treated, many of us are happy to be called by our first names.

However, it is not enough for hospital staff to assume that this is their patient’s wish. They should use the form of address their patient prefers, be it Mr, Mrs or Miss followed by their surname, their first name, or as in my grandmother’s case, a nickname.

We hear a lot about patients’ right to dignity, and it saddens me that it has taken a High Court judge to remind us that they also have a right to this common, but essential, courtesy.