Extraordinary lives
MY MOTHER ATILAXMI RAJNIKANT PATEL HAVE you lost a relative or friend in recent months whose life you’d like to celebrate? Our Friday column tells the stories of ordinary people who lived extraordinary
MY MUM — or Ba, as her three children and granddaughter called her — are two small words to describe a women who was a large presence in many lives. Independent, living on her own until the end of her full life, she really was a woman of our times. She spent her childhood in Arusha, a city in East Africa’s Tanzania, where her father was the postmaster. She often talked about the beauty of Mount Kilimanjaro, and when I reached its summit in 2014, it was for both of us. On her marriage in Dar es Salaam, Tanzania, in 1955, Mum followed the Hindu tradition of taking my father’s name, Rajnikant, as her middle name. Their families knew each other and it was an arranged marriage. When my father came to the UK in 1961 as part of the British Indian migration from the Empire, Mum travelled with their toddler son, Prashant, to India to stay with family. In 1964, she flew to London and the family was reunited. Life wasn’t always easy,
but Mum never moaned. When my sister, Visha, and I were born, the family lived in rented rooms and Dad worked in factories and then for Ford in Dagenham. Mum was happy to work in any factory as long as she was able to wear a sari — her jobs included a commercial launderette, a shirt factory and Brentford Nylons. She would wake up early so she could cook and clean before she went to work. She was the most fantastic cook and the food she made for parties were always the most popular snacks. Mum loved to travel, whether it was zig-zagging across the U.S. or jumping on the Tube to visit relatives. Her last trip abroad was to Mauritius in 2016 to attend a family wedding and where she got to see her beloved Indian Ocean once more. She had so little, but gave so much. Her generosity was renowned. Brave until the end, she came through major surgery and was able to spend her final few days with her family. Even then, she talked about making one more trip. As in life, she died with grace and dignity, in control of her own destiny. Her legacy and inspiration will live on with her children and granddaughter, Jess, and guide us through our daily lives. In her memory, this year I trekked to Everest Base Camp and ran in the London Marathon, raising more than £3,300 for Cancer Research UK.
ATILAXMI RAJNIKANT PATEL, born October 27, 1933; died June 8, 2018, aged 84.