DEAR BEL,
WHEN I make new friends all is well for a while. We meet and message regularly, but then they develop other friendships and interests. Soon meetings and messaging becomes intermittent.
I decided I must have a boring personality and so I have incorporated aspects of personalities of people who are popular in the hope it would make a difference. But it has not been as successful as I hoped it would be — and by taking this course I don’t know how to be myself any more.
I cannot have a relaxed conversation with most people because I am constantly thinking about what to say next, feeling on edge in case I stay on one subject too long. At work, I see my colleagues develop friendships and wonder why it is different for me.
I joined a gym in the hope I would make new friends, but to no avail — most come along with friends and those on their own don’t talk to anyone.
I sometimes feel isolated when I see photos of my friends on social media within their new friendship groups.
I don’t know what the answer is to my dilemma.