Our toy tank blew its top and so did Mum!

FURTHER to the amusing tale about dropping a brick from a great height on a younger brother wearing a tin helmet, my childhood friend Malcolm collected anything military. When we played outside, he would supply our gang — there were about ten to 12 of us — with tin helmets and banger guns or even a genuine gun. These ranged from a flare gun to a Martini-Henry carbine and a Lee-Enfield. Luckily, we didn’t have any ammunition. The banger guns were a piece of plumber’s water pipe with a small slit at one end. Fitted to a piece of wood, the slit end was flattened so a penny banger could slide down from the open end and be lit. It then made a bang and shot out. With his usual genius inspiration, Malcolm thought if it worked in a small pipe then a wider pipe with lots of bangers would make a bigger bang. That then led to the idea of making a tank. This was a pram wheel trolley and a framework covered in old blankets and carpets, with the gun pipe sticking out. Geoffrey was given the job of tank commander. The order was given to ‘Fire!’

There was a dull, loud thud, and smoke billowed from the blankets. Nothing came out of the gun, but out shot Geoffrey with a blackened face and singed, smoking hair. We all scarpered in fear. Some time later, his mother knocked on my front door, ranting and raving at me for getting her son into such a state. I was pulled back into the house by my shirt collar and told by Mum not to mess about with that sort of thing ever again. But as Malcom was such fun to play with, we got up to more exploits with militaria. Today, we would probably be seen as young offenders!

George McKie, Warrington, Cheshire.