CHRISTMAS QUIZ

1. What was ‘the sweetest moment’ at last year’s traditional Royal Christmas Day church service, which went viral, according to Hello! ?

A. The brief embrace of the Duchesses, when ‘Meghan placed a caring hand on Kate’s back’

B. The touching gesture towards a fellow Duchess when Kate thoughtfully flicked some of the dandruff from Meghan’s collar

C. The standing ovation given to the pregnant Duchess Meghan’s ‘perfect curtsey’

2. On what did Catherine ZetaJones (right) splurge £16,000 to make 2003 a memorable family Christmas?

A. Traditional Mumbles-style Moet ’n’ Marmite party

B. Specially customised course of triple-addiction therapy for husband Michael (covering sex, smoking and nail-biting)

C. New knees for her granny

3. What did George V and the rest of his seven-gun shooting party bag in a single day at Beaconsfield, Buckinghamshire, a week before Christmas 1913?

A. Dowager duchess and an under-footman ‘in flagrante’ behind the cowshed

B. Seven beaters, two retrievers and a pure-bred Jersey cow

C. Three thousand, nine hundred and thirty-seven pheasants, four rabbits, three partridges and one ‘various’

4. A survey by Detoxil detox pills in 2004 revealed that 26 per cent of women preferred to lose the festive pounds by:

A. Switching to low-calorie chablis for binge-drinking

B. Liposuction

C. Making love to George Clooney

5. Who said: ‘My husband grows a Christmas beard. When the kids were tiny, that’s how they knew it was the start of Christmas’?

A. Gabby Logan

B. Jane Goldman

C. Claudia Winkleman

6. Who said: ‘I greet my husband dressed in nothing but a pair of jingle bells on my boobs and do a silly dance’?

A. Jo Brand

B. Victoria Coren Mitchell

C. Jools Oliver

7. In 1644, Oliver Cromwell’s

Puritan parliament passed a law abolishing Christmas because it ‘gave liberty’ to what?

A. ‘Carnal and sensual delights’

B. ‘Unseemly wassailing and merriment’

C. ‘The enjoyment of heretical pagan decorations’

8. In Blackadder’s Christmas Carol, what business did ‘the kindest and loveliest man in all England’ Ebenezer Blackadder, played by Rowan Atkinson (right), run in Dumpling Lane?

A. Refuge for fallen women

B. Gruel kitchen

C. Moustache shop

9. Fifteen years ago, emergency services were called out on Christmas morning to . . .

A. 18 chimney-related extractions

B. Rescue a bell-ringer who had become entangled and spent two hours going up and down in an Edinburgh church

C. Rescue a reveller who had passed out and spent the night going up and down in a lift at Reading railway station

10. Which Hollywood legend performed in two British pantomimes — Cinderella at Manchester’s Prince’s Theatre and Dick Whittington at the Hippodrome, Leicester Square?

A. Cary Grant (while he was still Archie Leach)

B. W. C. Fields

C. Mickey Rooney

11. How was the festive spirit injected into the Australian A-League match between Sydney FC and Central Coast Mariners on Boxing Day 2015?

A. The referee blew for kick-off with a party squeaker

B. The special Christmas pudding-style match ball was placed on the centre spot by celebrity Santa Matt Lucas

C. Instead of the traditional start of tossing a coin, the referee gave the team captains a Christmas cracker to pull

12. In 2004, the Women’s Institute launched a festive appeal to its members to . . .

A. For goodness’ sake, keep your cardies on when there are calendar photographers about

B. Knit woolly jumpers for fairy penguins in Australia

C. Eschew over-indulgence in favour of Pilates or pole-dancing

13. Which Hollywood legend said: ‘All I want for Christmas is another picture with Audrey Hepburn’ (right)?

A. Sean Connery after Robin And Marian in 1976

B. Cary Grant after Charade in 1963

C. Billy Wilder after Some Like It Hot in 1959

14. The first Christmas card, in 1843, was criticised for ‘fostering the moral corruption of children’. What did it depict?

A. Boy and girl tucking into an enormous Christmas pudding

B. A lady and gentleman entwined in a waltz

C. A family, including children, raising wine glasses towards the absent guest — the recipient

15. In TV series Earthworm Jim’s final episode, For Whom The Jingle Bell Tolls, who tries to brainwash Santa Claus?

A. Queen Slug-For-A-Butt

B. Jaepius: God Of Puns

C. Caractacus Snott: Master Of The Universe