I’m worried he’s becoming obsessed

DOM SAYS:

What a terribly sad letter to receive — my heart goes out to you both. to have had so many failed attempts at IVF must be absolutely soul-crushing. I really do feel for you.

Your emotional reserves must be drained. Five IVF cycles really is a lot, and, at the end of the day, I have to say I side with you here. as the potential mother, you are the one who is — and has been — suffering the most from this.

Physically, with all of the drugs and the injections, and emotionally, too, because you feel the onus is on you to become pregnant. In that context, I believe very firmly that the decision you have taken is the right one.

at 43, it’s time to bite the bullet and admit it’s not working and you can’t carry on. You have been brave to have faced these facts, and I wholeheartedly support you in that. the difficult thing is that your husband is not listening to you.

You both want a family and you have been united in your attempts to have one, but now you find you are divided.

You have both come to a different decision. You have found clarity, while your husband is still snowblinded. he cannot see the wood for trees.

his insistence on searching for a solution abroad is troubling me. If it isn’t working here, why is it going to work abroad? there is no magic wand. I am also concerned for your husband’s emotional health. he is becoming obsessed.

If he continues to go down this route, it might ruin your marriage as you will begin to resent and loathe him. I think he needs to seek counselling. this has to stop for the sake of both of you.

I am sure it’s not your husband’s intention to leave you. But should he choose to do so in order to become a father, then so be it.

If he is that obsessed, then there is little you can do.

this is the time for marriage guidance of some sort. You have my full support for being so courageous. and you must continue to be so.

IF YOU have a question you’d like Steph and Dom to tackle, write to: stephanddom@ dailymail.co.uk