Without uniforms, the royal mystique becomes threadbare
THere have been touching tributes from Prince Charles, tears from the Countess of Wessex, rosy family photographs from the Duchess of Cambridge, St Fergie of Condolence nipping over to comfort the Queen.
We had Prince Andrew sidling in from stage right, hoping everyone will forget the embarrassments of the recent past; Princess Anne paying tribute to her ‘teacher, supporter and critic’ and Princess eugenie rather patronisingly promising to ‘look after Granny’ — while 94-year- old Granny was already out there, having returned to royal duties four days after the death of her husband.
As Prince Philip lies in rest at Windsor Castle, his nearest and dearest are preparing themselves for his funeral tomorrow as only they know how. Yet nestled among the tea and the nation’s sympathies has been an unedifying row over who will and who won’t be allowed to wear military uniform to the service.
First, Prince Harry is not entitled to wear a dress uniform, after stepping down from royal duties in January 2020. Adding to the mess is Andrew, who wanted to go as a full admiral — naval officer, not butterfly. But that might not be entirely appropriate, given that, although the Jeffrey consistently epstein allegations denied, forced his withdrawal from public life.
on a human level, one might have hoped these two ex-military men should be able to wear what they want to honour their grandfather and father. Yet to save the blushes of all, espet especially Harry, the Queen has ruled that senior royals will wear morning dress instead. No!
This decision might be circumspect, it might be pragmatic, even wise. But might it not be ultimately diminishing, too?
For what is the point of the royal Family if not to be medalled and beribboned, striding about at some great event with h ceremonial swords at their r hips and plumes of ostrich h feathers a- billow in their r silly hats? We need them in n medieval velvet capes, we e want to see them groan n under the weight of flashing epaulettes and grids of gold buttons visible from the cheap seats.
What we need, above all, is the circumstance of pomp. And such gilded signifiers of rank and status are terribly important, for what are the Windsors without them? Just another bunch of no-talents with an ancestor, as Kathy Burke might say. Those who believe that all formality is a front, and that the only point of a royal veneer is that it should crack — well, this is their moment.
one can see why HM has made this decision, because the potential for embarrassment is profound. Picture Charles with his overhang of medals, none of them for valour in combat, wreathed in a sadness that seems to have aged him immeasurably in the space of a week.
Next to him is William, roped in gold braid and cold fury. Andrew hides behind a pillar, anxiously counting the rows of frogging on his sleeves. And then comes the treacherous Harry, humiliated in the sackcloth of an ordinary suit and his terrible socks; a Coriolanus thrust into the marketplace to show his wounds. Some might say it is no more than he deserves, and they have a point. Yet this decision to have a mufti funeral might well go down in history as another turning point in the royal Family fortunes. And that turn will be a downward one: a lurch onto the thinning ice of the empire as the ragbag of headstrong younger royals skate ever faster towards the igloo of irrelevance.
This kind of capitulation makes the Windsors seem porous and vulnerable, under siege from the wrecking ball of the Sussexes and the creeping predications of the woke mob.
Because once we start to question the military uniforms, we start to question everything. And soon it will become impossible to ignore the preposterousness of the very existence of the House of Windsor, in the minds of the disbelievers, at any rate.
of course, this is the absolute last thing the Queen needs right now. But funerals, like weddings, tend to expose family tensions. Behind this carefully planned event one can sense the jostle for status and positioning, the weight of secret showdowns and overruled requests — and an not just among the men. m Prince Philip’s close confidante co Lady romsey will be there tomorrow but there is still no place fo for Sarah, Duchess of York. She remains unforgiven, a pariah, even after a death. This seems incredibly n harsh, considering e that Prince Andrew has done more to embarrass himself and the royal Family than she ever did. However, the show m must go on and the W Windsors will once more display to the t world their collective gift for impassive ceremony, despite the churning human emotions that lie beneath.
AND tomorrow, the primed canvas awaits. Yet whether the princes are in morning suits or military uniforms or dressed as penguins, nothing can fill the fissure of discord at the heart of this sad day, and the fact that two brothers who were once close cannot even walk together behind their grandfather’s coffin.
All this in a family ceremony rinsed of pageantry and personal signifiers of extraordinary and unique status?
Perhaps Harry and Meghan will see this banishment of military uniforms — this willingness to bend tradition to save face and keep Harry happy at all costs — as a personal triumph. Their modern will, their wish to be their authentic selves, conquered the stuffy rules of the Palace.
only in years to come will the Windsors perhaps realise that, in a way, they were watching their own funeral, too.