COME ON YOU SPIVS!

SINCE you asked, and many of you did, the truth is I agonised long and hard about ripping up my season ticket at Spurs.

Then I watched what some of us still call the League Cup final, largely in the same way some motorists slow down to watch a car crash on the other carriageway.

It wasn’t just the crass sloganising in the stands either side of the tunnel — as if a naughty schoolboy had just been forced to write out 100 lines: I must not be a racist, today or any other day.

Nor was it all the different logos the players were wearing — everything from secondhand car salesmen ‘ sleeve sponsors’ to virtue-signalling NHS badges — which made them look like Formula One racing drivers.

It was the fact that Spurs — the Lilywhites — were sent out in vile green and pink shirts, even though there was no clash with Man City’s sky blue, just so that Little Daniel could try to shift some of the hideous, superfluous ‘third kits’ cluttering up his cashless superstore on the High Road.

Come On you Spivs!

NO ONE out here in the real world is talking about Desperate Dom or Allegra or the rest of them picking the fluff out of Downing Street’s navel. Sacking Cummings was, however, a mistake. I can only assume Boris is not familiar with LBJ’s policy on tents.

LOVeD the story in the mail on Sunday about inmates at HmP Peterborough being allowed to decorate their cells in their favourite colours. The walls in the one pictured were shocking pink. Can’t help wondering what Norman Stanley Fletcher would have thought. Looks like Lukewarm’s got the painters in again.