Rhyme For Our Time

(With apologies to Flanders and Swann) I’m a g-nome, A garden g-nome, The g-nats round here are

g-nawing my old dome. I’m a g-nome, My name is Jerome, I’m tied to a lump of

g-neiss so I can’t roam. Oh, what a life, If I had a k-nife, I’d cut the k-nots that bind

and then leave home. But if I fell and k-nocked

my head, I’d be k-nackered

(if not dead), So I just g-nash my teeth instead ’cos I’m a g-nome!

I. G. Fenner, New Milton, Hants.