Westminster wars

■ PARADING his ecoagenda before an audience of billionaires, Boris said he was channelling the passion of Gordon Gekko declaring: ‘Green is good!’ He should have stuck to the original ‘greed’ is good given his plans to plunder our pockets with £1trillion in spending.

■ DOOMstER Prof Neil Ferguson warns that unless we’ve all been booster jabbed, we are heading for Plan B-plus, code for another Christmas lockdown. I’m planning for Plan C — as in Carrie, who had her bestie Nimco ali stay last year to help with childcare. I’ve invited a few mates to come and stay in my bubble over Christmas to help me with my cat, ted.

■ NOT a single Cabinet minister has said they have a heat pump after journalists asked all 30 of them. Proof all their green promises are nothing more than hot air?