Just admit you’re in the wrong, Ben

BEN AFFLECK has blamed his troubles on being ‘trapped’ in his marriage to ex-wife Jennifer Garner. There are many reasons why people turn to drink, or indeed drugs or any number of unhelpful behaviours. But why do we so often feel the need to point the finger of blame? There’s a difference between understanding the reason for your behaviour, and dodging responsibility. I saw this a lot when I worked in drug and alcohol services. Many people had difficult or traumatic pasts. But they often struggled to accept they were still responsible for the fact they chose to use substances to numb the pain. You can’t spend your life looking back and blaming others for something you’re choosing to do now. One of the best things for your emotional growth is to acknowledge the problems in your life and accept the part you play in perpetuating them. Taking responsibility is scary. But it’s also incredibly liberating. Only then can we also come to the realisation that we can make a different choice in the future.