Ephraim Hardcastle
THE Queen’s increasing frailty prompts concerns about her presence on the Buckingham Palace balcony at two events over the Platinum Jubilee weekend. Courtiers fret about what to do should HM be unable to appear. Charles and Camilla as substitutes may not have the same box office appeal and could cause international broadcasters to curtail coverage. And does HM really relish attending the four-act, two-mile pageant featuring the likes of Heston Blumenthal, Gary Lineker, Gok Wan and Basil Brush?
THE Queen’s fondness for jazz supremo Duke Ellington was reciprocated. In 1959 his orchestra went into the recording studio and produced just one vinyl pressing of The Queen’s Suite, in honour of HM. He presented it to her and it was never commercially released in his lifetime. Does she still give it a spin?
PIERS Morgan hasn’t forgiven Nigel Farage for trying to sabotage his Talk TV Trump interview, remarking of the exUkip leader’s appearance in a boat observing refugees: ‘All I can spot is a gormless, treacherous shark in a red vest.’
WIDE awoke Emma Watson, pictured, next month celebrates her second anniversary as chair of the sustainable developments committee of eco-friendly luxury goods giant Kering. The French magazine Challenges reports that despite attending only two of the last ten board meetings (overall attendance rate 18 per cent), the Harry Potter star qualifies for a pro rata 26,400 euro (£22,185) annual director’s fee. Does Kering manufacture old rope?
ROYAL scribe Tina Brown quotes a family friend visiting the Headington Hill Hall bedroom of ten-year-old Ghislaine Maxwell and being shown a strap, a slipper and an odd-shaped hairbrush. ‘This is what Daddy uses to beat me with,’ Brown quotes the acquaintance being told. ‘But he always allows me to choose which one I want.’ As GK Chesterton observed: ‘In the childhood of Judas, Jesus was betrayed.’
ROGER Moore’s For Your Eyes Only Bond co-star Carole Bouquet, 64, slams Madonna for her multiple facelifts, declaring in a French TV interview: ‘It’s scary... How can she bear to look at herself in the mirror? It’s not her, is it?!’ And Carole’s remedy? ‘Just don’t spend so much time staring at yourself!’
PRINCE Philip’s favourite hymn, John Bunyan’s To Be A Pilgrim, featured in his Westminster Abbey Thanksgiving service, omitting the line ‘Hobgoblin nor foul fiend can daunt his spirit’. Complains The Oldie: ‘Prince Philip liked colourful language and had little time for political trimmers.’ Its verdict on the amended hymn? ‘Boring!’
ACTOR Jack Lowden, determined to flaunt his Scottishness, and girlfriend Saoirse Ronan recreated a battle scene from Braveheart ahead of Scotland’s Euro 2020 clash with England. More recently he booed God Save The Queen at Murrayfield, declaring: ‘What’s the point in being polite?’ So where does Caledonian Jack hail from? He was born in Chelmsford!
Email: john.mcentee@dailymail.co.uk