Ephraim Hardcastle
SHOULD Harry and Meghan arrive for the Queen’s Jubilee knees-up with a Netflix film crew in tow, they will get short shrift from Buckingham Palace. When the couple, who have a reputed £80million deal with the streaming firm, visited the Queen at Windsor en route to the Invictus Games in the Netherlands, the cameramen and producers were given no quarter by courtiers. Says one: ‘They weren’t even offered a cup of tea in the servants’ hall.’
ANY delight Meghan’s installation in Madame Tussauds affords might be diminished by the remaindering of her book The Bench on Amazon US. The price has fallen from £7.58 to £1.62. Meanwhile, the Party Pieces company run by the Duchess of Cambridge’s parents has a new range featuring a child called Tilly and her little dog Tigg. How reminiscent of the Duchess of Sussex’s old blog ‘The Tig’. Coincidence?
WAR Horse writer Sir Michael Morpurgo tells Waitrose magazine of his delight at meeting the Queen only to discover she had already met Joey, the life-sized puppet horse from his National Theatre hit. ‘She happened to have seen the play and developed a great affection for Joey,’ recalls Sir Michael. ‘So much so that he was invited to see her before I was. He had his own audience with the Queen!’
AS predicted here, 47-year-old David Beckham (pictured) does not consider himself middle-aged. He has declined an appearance on Gabby Logan’s mid-life issues podcast The Mid. Point. Explains Gabby: ‘Very few people, I’m delighted to say, have not agreed to come on. David Beckham, his associate, let’s say, who replied to me, seemed mildly disgusted that David would fit into the demographic. As somebody pointed out I don’t think the Beckhams consider themselves to have ages really.’
IS KISS warbler Gene Simmons urging 78-year-old Mick Jagger to retire? ‘I’m 72 and still in great shape, but am I going to be convincing doing this at 75? No. Because I still have to wear these dragon boots proudly,’ he tells Classic rock. ‘each of them weighs almost as much as a bowling ball – plus I wear about 40lbs of armour and studs and guitars that I’m carrying around on eight-inch platform heels. Jagger’s in amazing shape, but he wouldn’t last a half hour in my outfit.’
WHAT’S William and Harry’s view on Charles’ imminent EastEnders cameo? In a 2016 documentary they told Ant and Dec their father was an embarrassment at school plays because he laughed in all the wrong places. And Prince Philip laughed through 17-year-old Charles’ Gordonstoun School performance of Macbeth. ‘Funniest thing I’ve ever seen,’ said the duke.
CURRENTLY touring his one-man show, Barry Humphries, ranting about theatregoers who wear sunglasses indoors, spotted a would-be culprit in the front row and invited him up on stage. Too late, he saw the white stick. What did he do? embraced the man and exclaimed: ‘Thank goodness you didn’t bring your dog.’