FIND LOVE WITHOUT BREAKING THE BANK
TIME IS MONEY
PEOPLE can spend an enormous amount of time on dating apps. Time is money, so set restrictions. It might be, ‘I’m only going to go on the app for 30 minutes on a Thursday evening’ or ‘I’m only going to look at ten profiles’.
If you match with someone you like, it is always better to organise meeting up on the app. Studies show that if you exchange numbers to sort a date, you are 30 per cent less likely to go on one.
TRY MEETING THE OLD-FASHIONED WAY
DATING app subscriptions can be expensive and, though it may seem rare these days, you really can meet someone in person. In fact, the best success rate in relationships is when people meet at work. The second is being introduced by friends and family. You can also just say hello to a stranger. Be brave and tell them the reason you were drawn to talk to them — it might be their eyes or their cool jacket.
NO SUCH THING AS A ‘FIRST DATE’
THE ‘first date’ shouldn’t be a date at all, it should be a ‘meet up’. Do this over coffee. This is not only cheaper but cuts down on the preparatory costs, too: as it’s casual, you don’t need to spend an inordinate amount of money on new clothes or getting your nails done.
Set a half-hour time limit between you beforehand — this gives you an out if you’re not interested. But if you both decide to break that rule, you know you like each other.
DITCH THE PRICEY DINNERS OUT
THE worst type of date is drinks followed by a three-course dinner. Everything and everyone seems better after a drink so your beer goggles are firmly on. These meals become about flirty conversation and often serve no real purpose in identifying who this person is. The more elaborate the first date, the more akin it is to love bombing — a tactic often associated with narcissists.
DATING IS A WALK IN THE PARK
AFTER your initial ‘meet up’, the most effective ‘official’ first date is a walk. It gives you a sense of someone’s intentions: if they say no to a walk, they’re probably not interested in a serious relationship and just want a one-night stand. Walking for half an hour also produces endorphins, making you feel euphoric. This pushes you out of your shell and reveals the true you. n Married at First Sight UK is at 9pm, Monday to Thursdays, on e4.