World Cup Watch

■ FIRST laugh of the Budweiser- sponsored tournament as the Qatari royal family suddenly bans alcohol in stadiums. Serves the fans right for going there — yet how sad they can’t even cry into their beer over it.

■ OUR boys flew into Qatar on a Virgin plane with a bloke painted on the front wearing rainbow trainers. Great PR for Richard Branson whose staff can identify as any gender, yet when entering countries like Qatar have to dress so as not to upset the local homophobes.

■ NOT a great start when the lads lost on penalties in a charity game to a team of burly migrant workers picked by Qatari authorities. One wonders how representative they were of the 6,500 foreign contractors who have died in the desert state since it was announced as the cup’s host.