When you have money, there’s a danger of thinking: I can get someone to grow a baby for me
early stages of pregnancy, she received a shocking phone call from Catherine. With little preamble and no apology, Catherine told her that she’d just had a son, delivered by another surrogate.
‘She said she wanted to tell me before I read about it in the newspapers — and when I remarked that she’d never told me she had another surrogate, she said words to the effect that she had been under no obligation to tell me.
‘After we hung up, I was shocked but I messaged her and said “congratulations, enjoy the baby”. She didn’t respond.’
Knowing that Catherine finally had a child and with their relationship so strained, Shanna admits briefly thinking there might be some relief if this third pregnancy failed, too.
‘I hate to say it but I did,’ she confesses. ‘Part of me wouldn’t wish a loss on anyone, so I struggled with those feelings.
‘I still had hopes that this would work, or that whatever way it
went would work out for the best. It was a mixed bag of emotions.’
Shanna was monitored by the clinic and took another blood test to check her hCG hormone levels
three days after the phone call. The result came back as inconclusive — and when she reported this to Catherine, the celebrity sent only a brief response, saying to keep her informed. Shanna waited it out, but her hormone levels started to drop.
‘I knew things were going wrong and I contacted Catherine to keep her updated. Because I was unsure about our relationship by this point, I felt apprehensive about even speaking to her, so I sent her a message instead. I said ‘I’m sorry that it’s bad news . . . it’s not a miscarriage yet but it looks like that’s where it’s headed.’
She asked after Catherine’s new baby and also asked whether she should forward the remainder of the bills to her.
She was astonished when Catherine texted back: ‘Shanna, our relationship has ended. I am appalled at your coldness over the birth of my child. Forward your bills.’
Shanna was paid about $11,000 (£8,920) plus expenses. She said the contract she signed with Catherine had specified a $45,000 payment for a baby, $55,000 if it was twins and $60,000 for triplets or more.
The two women didn’t speak again — and two weeks after she cut her ties with Catherine, Shanna had a miscarriage.
‘It was like a very, very heavy period,’ she recalls.
Months later, Catherine was on television and made disparaging comments about surrogates. ‘I burst into tears,’ Shanna admits.
She says she felt that Catherine made her feel like an employee.
‘I’m worried that surrogacy is being taken too lightly — you can order your designer clothes and shoes and your designer baby,’ says Shanna. ‘Obviously, there are times when a woman has a
I was told she’d had a baby — with another surrogate
medical condition where she physically can’t carry a child — but that’s not all that’s happening. I think when you have money and privilege, there’s a danger of people thinking: “I can get someone to grow a baby for me.”
Shanna also believes women who have their babies by surrogate should be truthful about it. ‘I do think they have to be more open and honest about how their baby came to be, instead of just announcing “I have a baby!”
‘I feel sad for women who grow these wonderful lives for nine months, passing it to someone else, and that the trials they went through are not acknowledged.’
Four years after Shanna and Catherine parted ways, Shanna carried twins for a non-celebrity couple she met at a fertility conference. The births were complicated and Shanna had a stroke and seizures and was in intensive care for seven days.
‘After the third surrogacy I nearly lost my life. It shows that there’s risk in every pregnancy — but it all turned out OK in the end,’ she says.
Astonishingly, she doesn’t regret her third surrogacy but instead says that, for the most part, ‘it was another beautiful experience, which washed away the difficult time I had with Catherine’.
The most important thing Shanna says she learned from being a surrogate is never to rush into the arrangement.
‘I believe both women have to sit down beforehand, working with a reputable surrogacy agency, to put down in detail what everyone is expecting from this journey. If you don’t, there are so many things that can go wrong.’
Shanna has had a hysterectomy, so there will be no more gifts of life to childless men and women. “I had two good experiences and one bad experience but I don’t regret them,’ she says.
‘I think women who carry babies for others are heroes and it’s a wonderful thing to do, as long as both sides know exactly what they’re getting into.’