‘ I’m up at 6am to work out, he rises at noon to play video games ’

DATING PAST

I HAD my son when i was 15 and was with his father for six years. Since then, i’ve had a couple of relationships. The last one ended six years ago — we were together for eight years, split for a decade, then got back together for five years. My advice? never go back.

PRE-DATE NERVES?

I HAVE to meet people all the time for my business, so no. having said that, i knew if i was attracted to him, the nerves would kick in.

FIRST IMPRESSIONS?

NOT great — sorry, Steve. When the waitress brought him over, i was disappointed because i didn’t feel he had made any effort for the date. he wore a creased shirt with a T- shirt underneath. i’d have expected him to wear a decent pair of jeans and a nice shirt at least.

i was wearing a lovely Karen Millen orange silky blouse with a navy skirt and boots. Steve went in for a hug and reeked of cigarettes. i’m a health freak so that’s a no for me.

EASY TO TALK TO?

WE FOUND out we have one thing in common: elvis. i’ve been to Graceland, his home in Memphis, a few times and Steve is a huge elvis fan, too. also, i own land in Thailand, and Steve is looking overseas in bulgaria and Portugal hoping to buy property.

We talked about feminism, and i said i’d be happy to pay half on a date, but not if the guy simply expected me to. We both had a sirloin steak. i decided the best way to get through the date was to drink and had three glasses of prosecco. Steve had three beers. We finished off with an irish coffee.

EMBARRASSING MOMENTS?

STEVE left me at our table on a few occasions to pop outside for a cigarette. by now, i was waiting for Jeremy beadle to jump out.

DID SPARKS FLY?

NO! STEVE didn’t flirt with me either. i’m up at 6am every day to work out, while Steve gets up at noon and is a gamer.

SEE HIM AGAIN?

I DON’T think so. but Steve did ask if we could swap numbers and i felt it rude to say no.

WHAT DO YOU THINK HE THOUGHT OF YOU?

I’M NOT sure, but he did text to let me know he’d be giving me a five- star review.

WOULD YOUR FAMILY LIKE HIM?

NO, NO, no. My son called after the date and i did make him laugh explaining how it went. Steve is a nice man, just not for me.

IT’S SO NOT A MATCH... CHECK OUT THE VIDEO!