Nothing says stealth wealth – and summer 2024 – like a pair of WHITE JEANS
...even if they don’t always flatter your thighs and do show every speck of dirt
YES it’s that time of year when some women’s thoughts turn to white jeans and others’ . . . definitely do not.
If you’re a female celebrity — almost any female celebrity but chief among the white jeans fanclub are Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, Katie Holmes, Sienna Miller and, lest you should suspect that white jeans are something you put away in your fifties, Cindy Crawford and Tilda Swinton — then you’ve already hunted out your white jeans. You were wearing them the first hot weekend in April (there is extra kudos in going early) and you’ve been making the most of the white jeans and a camel/navy polo neck sweater look.
Honestly it’s harder to think of an A-list celebrity who doesn’t, about now, break out her white jeans, because white jeans are the classic, never- out- of- style summer clothing perennial and worn right, they’ve become a soft status symbol.
If you’re a normal woman with a dog, who travels on public transport, gets caught in the rain, and who has a partner who eats chocolate in such a way that tiny barely visible chips settle on the sofa, then white jeans are the last thing on your list. Even if they weren’t just about as practical as white carpets, there’s the hip and thigh-exaggerating potential of white jeans to consider.
They get dirty in a flash, they add inches to your bum, they are not the busy, cash- strapped, woman’s friend, is how many of us feel about them. Fine on Meghan Markle ( slim, rich, Californian), not in real life.
And we’re not entirely wrong. There’s no getting away from the fact white jeans get dirtier 90 per cent faster than regular jeans but a washing machine with a quick cycle has that problem solved.
As for adding inches below the waist, yes they can, but only in exactly the same way that any jeans or trousers can; their whiteness — oddly enough — does not make them less flattering.
Pale pink, lilac, lemon yellow, all the pastels are liable to exaggerate your hips and bum but white, no, so long as they’re well cut and neither bulky nor skintight.
Which brings us swiftly on to the question of But Why Bother? Because, in 2024, white jeans offer not just an easy breezy cool alternative to blue jeans, they’re a short cut to discreet chic: the pared back, stealth wealthy minimalism that’s everywhere this year.
What if the secret to looking stylish, groomed and smart this summer was as easy as investing in the right white jeans? Or, to put it another way, can you look like a resident of Montecito, or a Parisian fashion editor, for the price of some Marks & Spencer wide-leg jeans, or a pair of Zara’s marine cut straights, and if so . . . might that not be fun?
It wasn’t always like this. White jeans in the last decade, from stretch low rise skinnies with a whale tale thong flipping out of
the back, to the ripped and razored cling ons favoured by model Gigi Hadid, have not always looked like ideal everyday wear. Since Audrey Hepburn and Jackie O established them as one of the building blocks of the elegant, sophisticated woman’s wardrobe it hasn’t all been smooth sailing for white jeans.
Lately they’ve acquired a somewhat flash, ‘Do I look like I care?’ reputation. Ask your husband what he thinks of when he thinks of white jeans and he may well say the second wives of hedge fund managers, blocking the road in their four-wheel-drives.
Ask your twenty- something daughter and she’ll narrow her eyes and beg you not to join the ranks of the bleached blonde mums in breton T- shirts and anklecropped white jeans.
But ask a fashion editor what
she thinks of white jeans in 2024 and she’ll tell you that a plain straight or wide-legged pair — jeans or trousers — are a key part of the pared-back luxury look for summer 2024. Wearing cream with ivory, with white, with more white or ecru, head-to-toe — or with a dose of black — is currently the fastest way to look expensive and glamorous.
We have the white shirt, the white tank, the white blazer and those mostly white Adidas Sambas. Wear some or all of them together with your white jeans and you’re doing the stealth wealth thing without even trying.
These are not the stiff, crackly heavy- duty white jeans which definitely do add heft below the waist (you need a model figure for those). They’re not the see-through second skin sort that show the pockets and your knickers, either. They may not even be denim. They are the smart jeans/black trousers alternative, and being white they have more glamour than both.
Will I, personally, be wearing white jeans? No. But I will be wearing ecru jeans and judging by the fact mine are currently Marks & Spencer’s biggest sellers, I’m not the only one.