SHE’S TOO HARD ON LITTLE GIRL

Dear Coleen

My grown-up daughter has two children who are three and six. She’s a great mum, but just lately I’ve noticed that she’s quite hard on the six-year-old.

Her husband works away a lot so it’s just her on her own a lot of the time. She’s given up her job, which she loved, because her husband is away so often.

Her eldest daughter is a lovely little girl, but she’s very sensitive, cries a lot and has always been prone to tantrums. I’ve had her overnight a few times and she’s lovely, but also very trying.

I sympathise with my daughter, but I’ve noticed that she’s not handling it very well.

She often snaps, locks her in her room, shouts at her and I’ve seen her grab her roughly a few times.

To be fair, it’s always because my granddaughter has done something wrong, but I still feel like my daughter is losing her cool too often with her.

She’s not like it with the threeyear-old who is as good as gold.

I don’t want to criticise my daughter at a time when I know she’s struggling, but I want to say something to her.

What should I do?

Coleen says

This is a really hard one. It’s so tiring when you have that one child who is really naughty and having tantrums. I had one!

Sometimes, as a mum, you do have times when you wonder whether you even like them because they’re so much harder than your others. It really does wear you out so your daughter has my sympathy.

If I were you I would suggest having your granddaughter more. Maybe you could have her overnight once a week, just to give your daughter a break.

Don’t let your granddaughter know it’s because she’s naughty, or because her mum finds her hard work. Say to your daughter, “Look, I can see she’s more demanding than her sister, so call me and I’ll take her out.”

Reassure her she’s a great mum and you don’t judge her.