It’s a shame Cilla wasn’t around to see Cliff cleared... I know it worried her
It’s not just alcohol Paul has cut down on. From his nights on the cabaret circuit, through to infamous Green Room parties, he has always been known as the life and soul, but it seems he is finally calming things down.
“Years ago I was always out clubbing, but now I’d only be sat in the club like Gollum, surrounded by children,” he says. “Oh my God, get me out quick! Besides, all the fun people are outside, smoking.”
Not that Paul is much of a smoker these days. The former 40-a-day man has had quite the lifestyle overhaul since suffering various heart problems.
“I have the odd ciggy, but I don’t smoke like I used to,” he says. “I used to wake in the morning and smoke heavily, but the thought of that now, well I’d just throw up. Forget it!
“I tried those awful vape things, but you feel such a fool stood there in a street like a kettle billowing smoke, I had one that was like the exhaust of a car.
“I am healthier now. I have changed my lifestyle and I take vitamins – I’m rattling right now with the vitamins I’ve taken to get through panto season.”
Paul is playing his role twice a day until January 15 at the Palladium, alongside a star-filled cast that includes Julian Clary, Amanda Holden, Lee Mead and Nigel Havers. The panto has had great reviews apart from the odd accusation that it is too smutty.
Paul is having none of it. “Nonsense,” he retorts. “The cheeky bits are to keep the adults entertained. After all, they paid to be there too. It goes over the kids’ heads so it’s harmless.
“Bawdy humour, double entendre, slapstick and a bit of filth is what we used to be well known for in the UK. And now we’ve gone all so bloody PC.”
In his role Paul has to get into dresses, heels and make-up. But he is adamant that there is no chance of resurrecting his alter ego Lily Savage, despite having all her outfits in storage.
“I forgot how painful it all is,” he says. “The panto costumes are skintight, but I have padded hips and bum. I forgot about my bum one night and it was only when I was getting a shower I was like what the hell is that? A vaguely obscene bum fell on my floor. I was horrified.
“The heels are no problem, but the make-up I loathe. I don’t know how women can wear it. I detest putting it on and I hate eating in it, especially as they put it on me with a trowel.
“If I was a woman I’d never put a scrap of make-up on or wear a bra or a corset. I’d go round in flats permanently and not give a damn what anyone else thought.
“There’s a lot of pressure on women. You only have to go in a newsagent and look at the magazines and every single cover has an airbrushed stunner on it. Then again, we have Men’s Health with some musclebound god on the cover. I look at it and think: ‘Sorry, that boat has sailed.’ I’m a burntout wreck of a once glorious disco, and it’s getting worse.”
Even if Paul was having a day when he thought he was looking good, you wouldn’t catch this keen avoider of social media taking any selfies.
He says: “The self-obsession now, my God! When people keep fit it is not really about that, it’s can I wear this skintight T-shirt? Get a life. And get out and live it, instead of taking pictures of your dinner.”
And Twitter? “Too many people take too much notice about what the morons on Twitter say. I’m not interested in some no-mark’s opinion in their bedroom in the middle of bloody nowhere.”
Paul’s own life is pretty full. His hour-long special of For The Love of Dogs will be on ITV on Christmas Day. And a documentary, Paul O’Grady’s Favourite Fairy Tales, is on screen next week.
He has also just finished filming in India for a show about elephants called Animal Orphans, although he admits he kept getting sidetracked, feeding the
Too many people take too much notice of what the morons on Twitter say
street dogs. “We went to the Taj Mahal, I took one look, ‘very nice’, then turned round to feed biscuits to the dogs,” he says. “I can’t help it. I am still haunted by what I saw, though. The things that some humans do to animals is beyond my comprehension at times.”
Paul is working on his next book, looking at the good and the bad of life in the countryside, and including some of his own baking recipes. But despite the success of his previous four autobiographies we won’t be seeing any of them turned into biopics.
“I remember Cilla saying to me about her biopic when she saw it, ‘I feel like it’s an obituary’. And then she was dead the year after. So I think I’ll leave that alone.
“Besides, after my first book a film studio in the States got in touch wanting to buy it, but they said I had to do a happy ending. They didn’t want my mum to die at the end. I said, ‘It’s not Harry Potter. She did die.’”
Cinderella is at the London Palladium until January 15. Tickets available at www.reallyusefultheatres.co.uk