SO WHO’S THE DADDY OF MY UNBORN CHILD?

Dear Coleen

I need your help! I’m pregnant with my first child, but I’m not sure who the father is. At the beginning of December I had unprotected sex with a former boyfriend (ex A), then had my period mid-month as usual.

However, I then slept with my husband seven times up until the end of December. I then slept with another ex at the beginning of January, but we used protection.

After seeing my doctor and having a scan, I was told my baby is due towards the end of September. I’m worried about who the father is – I’ve heard stories of women having their period, but being pregnant and it really scares me that ex A could be the dad. Plus, my cycle has never been regular. I want to know who the father is. Can you help?

Coleen says

The only way you’ll know for sure is by having a DNA test once the baby is born. Obviously, it sounds unlikely that “ex A” is the father if your period came as usual after you slept with him.

Paternity issues aside, what really strikes me about your letter is that you don’t sound the slightest bit remorseful. What a mess! What you should be focused on is why you’re sleeping around when you’re married. It’s very unfair on your husband and now you’re bringing a baby into a very uncertain situation.

You can’t be happy with your husband or you wouldn’t be sleeping with two of your exes. Whoever the baby belongs to (and for everyone’s sake, I hope it’s your husband’s), you need to give your marriage some careful thought.

Be honest with yourself about what you want and, if it’s to stay married, then you need to talk to your husband about what you feel is lacking and how you can work on those issues. Also, have some thought for the man you married and stop sleeping around.