MY MOTHER IS DATING AT AGE OF 75

Dear Coleen

I’m worried about my 75-year-old mother who has been seeing a man romantically for a couple of months.

She met him at a music evening in a pub and he’s a similar age (well, three years younger).

Don’t get me wrong, he seems nice enough – very chatty, friendly and helpful – but she barely knows him and she spends every waking hour (and some non-waking hours) with him.

I don’t see her at all anymore – she’s always off for dinner or to the movies, country walks and theatre.

Also, I don’t want to be cynical, but my mum owns her own very lovely house and drives (he doesn’t) and is financially secure.

Should I talk to her about whether she’s really sure about this man or am I overreacting?

Coleen says

I think you are most definitely overreacting.

By 75, most people have given up on finding love again, so I think your mum gives everyone hope and I think you should be thrilled for her.

I’m sure your mum isn’t an idiot – she sounds like an active, independent woman who knows her own mind and is determined to live her life to the full.

Be honest with yourself. Are you perhaps a little bit jealous of their relationship? And, sorry if this sounds a bit harsh, but are you afraid of your mum losing all her money, or are you afraid of you losing it?

You have no reason to think he’s not a nice man and he sounds great company for your mum.

I understand that you might be missing your mum because she’s wrapped up in this man at the moment, but that intensity won’t last forever.

Also, why not be more proactive about seeing her? Invite them over for dinner or suggest a day out so you can get to know him better.