I thought ‘this is it. I’m unlovable’. My anxiety was out of control...
Actress Sheridan Smith on her depression
You constantly worry you’re not going to be as good as people think you should be SHERIDAN ON HOW ANXIETY GOT WORSE AS FAME GREW
SHERIDAN Smith has spoken for the first time about the “out of control” anxiety that led to her breakdown last year.
The Cilla star pulled out of her West End show Funny Girl for several months with stress and exhaustion. Her father was also diagnosed with cancer and died in December.
Sheridan, 36, said the part of Fanny had been her “dream role” but depression and anxiety made it hard for her to get real perspective.
She admitted: “So you think, ‘That’s it, this is me. I’m unlovable, I’m inauthentic.’”
Sheridan said she was never nervous early in her career. But success in the stage show Legally Blonde, for which she won an Olivier award, changed things and she was soon working with the likes of Dustin Hoffman and Maggie Smith.
She told Culture magazine: “You’re constantly worrying you’re not going to be as good as people think you should be. When you have that degree of anxiety, you can’t just pull yourself together and you can’t explain it. It just
snowballs until it’s out of control.”
TERRIFIED
She added: “I didn’t want to talk about it because I just thought... people would say, ‘What have you got to be upset about?’ And I was totally grateful. “But at the same time, I was terrified I was going to come unstuck, that I couldn’t hold these feelings of insecurity in much longer without it coming to a head. Which it did last year. “My dad getting cancer triggered it but it had been a long time coming.” Sheridan has now vowed to simplify her career by taking on one job at a time. She is promoting an album, due out next month, ahead of a new TV project. The star added: “I’m not going to run myself into the ground again.”