See, men ARE the weaker sex

A big thank you to the scientist (whose gender is irrelevant, honest) who has proved beyond all doubt (again, honest) that man-flu is real, due to males having weaker immune protection against respiratory viruses.

We men have always known the phrase was a vicious slur invented by women who, due to childbirth, believe any pain suffered by men in comparison is on a par with being tickled. Well you’re wrong. Clearly. Evidentially.

All we need now is another male scientist (oops, let that slip) to assert that men are programmed to leave dribbles around the base of the toilet, throw tantrums on shopping trips, wear the same underpants for five days without noticing and switch-off three seconds into any woman’s story about the emotional state of their best friend, and we’ll be totally in the clear.