Sitting out Strictly

I’m asked to do Strictly Come Dancing every year but I’m just too busy. Anyway, I might be a bit of a disappointment to the judges – my favourite dance is Oops Upside Your Head because you can sit on the floor.

I’d also really like to read their terms and conditions for voting in that bit upstairs with Claudia. I’d turn up dressed as Freddie Mercury so I’ll get cast as him for any sequels. Although – spoiler alert – I’ve a feeling he might die in the new movie.