Going up...

Talk shows

Revealing a spoiler about a TV show is now considered a more heinous crime than murder, so the latest thing is Netflix viewing parties. You pick a programme, synchronise watches and then all tune in, discussing it privately on Whatsapp as you go. On one hand, this sounds beyond sad. On the other, it’s a party you stay at home, alone, for, ie THE DREAM.

Coffee moaning

As New Year’s resolutions go, it is at least original: in 2019, Starbucks is going to start blocking customers from watching porn on their premises. This news would be easier to enjoy if it didn’t force you to acknowledge that loads of people must have been watching porn in Starbucks. Oh, and will be until the end of the year.