TV star’s battle with bulimia

FEARNE Cotton has opened up for the first time about her battle with bulimia.

The TV presenter, who has talked about depression and panic attacks, had never spoken about her eating disorder. She said the bulimia was caused by Imposter Syndrome from finding fame at such a young age.

Fearne, 38, said: “I didn’t feel smart enough or good enough at the job.” Explaining how her stress manifested she said:

“The main one was a disordered relationship with my body and food for 10 years.

“It’s been this weird secret

I’ve felt a little bit embarrassed of, a little bit ashamed of, a little bit worried about.

“I’m still worried now about what people are going to think when I share this side of myself.

“I had this new release I invented for myself – to have bulimia. I had that on/off for a good decade of my life.

“In the beginning of my

20s it was quite intense and sort of ruled everything and in my later

20s it was more like a bad habit I’d kick into if something emotional was happening or if I felt out of control. It was my go to thing but wasn’t as regular.”

Fearne, who was presenting her own show on Radio 1 and made a documentary about anorexia for ITV in 2009, kept

Radio DJ Fearne in 2005 the disease hidden from her friends, with only her mum knowing the true extent.

Speaking with the How To Fail With Elizabeth Day podcast, she said: “It was something no one knew about me because at times I was very overexposed.

“Partly it was about control. I had this first chunk of my life doing normal family things and the next chunk switched up and it was bonkers at times so it was a way of feeling I was calling the shots.

“I am sad to look back and see it was so out of control. I never binged and puked up. I ate regular meals but then got rid of it all and it felt like a release.

“My mum will probably be quite upset I’ve talked about it. I know as a parent it was a horrendous time.”

Fearne, who has children, Rex, six and Honey, four, as well as stepchildren Lola, 14, and Arthur, 16, with husband Jesse Wood said wanting to be a mum helped her.

She added: “I’d met Jesse and wasn’t regularly purging but it would still be a fallback if things felt stressful. At this point I desperately wanted to have a baby.

“Getting pregnant, I let go of all of it. I ate everything in sight. It just went overnight.

“It came back, the feelings of loathing about my body after the birth, but I didn’t go back to the illness. I knew I had to stick to a very practical way of looking at food to sustain my health for myself and my newborn baby.”