Cake’s past its best but we’ve raisins to be cheerful

AH, the cake! The Christmas special I found on safari to the depths of Mrs R’s pantry. Never before had I dared to explore this hidden quarter of the house, but the pandemic made me brave.

And there I discovered the Wye Valley Beer Rich Fruit Cake from Frank’s Farmhouse Bakery in Hereford.

This award-winning masterpiece was made with “succulent fruit and locally sourced stout”.

I half-expected a head on it. A sticker on top proclaimed “Great Taste Gold” winner. In, er, 2010. But the cake has been brought out, and put back, many times, still in its protective wrapping. It has a “best before” date of August 2018.

Who knows when it was bought? Since appearing here many months ago, it’s become the most famous cake in Cross Hills. Not that there’s much competition. And that’s not the point – which is: has it survived a house move and heaven knows how many years below the stone stairs in ‘erself’s pantry?

Well, I think so. I found it perfect. Mrs R thought it “a bit dry”, but as I pointed out, she might be too after living in the dark wrapped in cellophane for so long.

Brother John gave it the thumbs-up too, but he may just have been polite after tucking into the turkey, Morrisons’ finest, five and a half kilos for less than 20 quid.

We should have eaten cheese with the cake, as is tradition hereabouts (and elsewhere, for all I know) so for the last slices out came the Wensleydale to do the job right.

Apart from the Wye Valley Fruit Cake Event, it was another quiet holiday.

We came through the Plague Year, which is a great deal to be thankful for.

Had our cake and eaten it? Not quite.