– Ouch! PAT NEVIN tells it straight on Radio 5 Live

Denmark’s Martin Braithwaite has enough business interests off the field to keep him ticking over when he hangs up his boots.

There’s a £180million property company and French clothing range for starters. Plus a vegetarian restaurant in Barcelona - a venture he didn’t bother with when he was at Middlesbrough. Funny that.

Ross Kemp promoting something or other by pretending to be a passionate England fan OR a terrifying giant baby demanding more mashed banana? You decide.