SWEETEST PET SELFIE

“My 16-year-old cat Rocky had been poorly for a long time with an overactive thyroid before I had to make the heartbreaking decision to let him go last month,” says a devastated Julie Ringrose from Gosberton, Lincs.

She adds: “I rehomed him and another cat called Star in 2015 from Derby Cats Protection when they were about eight. After my divorce, I took them back to my home village. We live down a little lane in the open countryside. Rocky is buried in the garden and now it’s just me and Star. We miss him so much.”

■ Send your tribute to siobhan.mcnally@mirror.co.uk

■ After reading your tale of woe with online dating, I wonder if you’ve ever considered a sugar daddy?

Think of the advantages. While you’re on a world cruise, your daughter could be serving a debutante’s apprenticeship at one of those posh girls’ schools, like Roedean.

You could be sipping pina coladas in the Caribbean as she learns deportment and which knife and fork to use, and most importantly, the correct way to pass the port.

I’d volunteer, but I don’t think I can offer a world cruise. Two weeks in a narrow boat up the Grand Union Canal is about my mark, but only if it isn’t raining.

Ian Pyke, Crawley, West Sussex

Ed: I think I’m 30 years too old for a sugar daddy, Ian. He’d have to be an Ovaltine daddy now.

■ You’re funny! WhatsApp me on 00000 000000 with the day ending in Y and stop yourself getting burnt out.

Anonymous, by email

Ed: Muuuum, I’ve told you to stop emailing and pretending to be my secret admirer.

■ I am a single 17st 2lb, 75-year-old loveable obese git with bad knees. Other than that, I think we’d be very compatible.

Trevor Coffey, Littlehampton, West Sussex

Ed: Be still my beating heart, Trevor. Ha, ha!

■ Keep at it, Siobhan. Ten years ago I met my partner online and we are still together!

You need to kiss a few frogs before your prince turns up.

Don’t give up yet. Good luck!

Dave Cullen, Bishop Auckland, Co Durham

Ed: Prince? I’d settle for the spit boy at this rate.