Dear Coleen

I STARTED a job in September and recently went to the office Christmas do. I had a great time but when speaking to everyone a common theme kept coming up – they all think I’m intimidating.

I can come across as being confident but actually I suffer with anxiety and overthink pretty much everything.

So as a result of these comments, I find I am now second-guessing myself on everything.

I feel there are many sides to me and I don’t want to come across as arrogant or intimidating as I’ve met that type of person and haven’t liked them.

Another thing is my sister used to work at my office and she was loved by everyone and, in hindsight, I feel I shouldn’t have gone for the role as I am forever walking in her footsteps.

However, it was a great chance to further my career and I think the people at work are lovely but they don’t seem to know me at all and have a distorted view of who I am and what I’m about.

I’m worried about returning after the Christmas break in case I’ll constantly be second-guessing myself at work. I’d hate to think people didn’t like me.

Any help would be much appreciated.