AllIhaveever wantedwasa goodhusband. Ifeelashamed heiswhatheis andsometimes IthinkIcanno longerbearit butIdon’thave anywhereto goandmykids needafather

SCiaF’s BiD To TaCKl

Mum-of-three loat tells how charity have helped to improve her desperate plight thanks to programme that aims to change the attitude of violent men LOAT Om has a recurring nightmare of her husband cutting her throat as she sleeps.

She is married to Lip Nhy, a violent drunk who threatened to kill their baby, so her fear is not unfounded.

Loat is a indigenous Cambodian. She’s illiterate and trapped at the bottom of the social pile in a patriarchal country where they say “a woman belongs near the kitchen stove”.

She is too tired to be angry, too realistic and too poor to imagine a route out.

Loat said: “Sometimes I see other women who have good husbands, who work and care for their wives, and I envy them. That’s all I ever wanted.”

We sit cross-legged on a roofed, wooden platform in her yard, sheltered from the searing sun, above chickens scratching in the dirt.

For two decades, I have written about domestic abuse in Scotland and spoken to women about their escape from it and the empowerment they found.

I live in a country slowly moving forward, reaping the benefits of decades of campaigning by groups su as Scottish Women’s Aid, who have forced the hand the police and judiciary to tackle domestic abuse.

In Cambodia, the court will openly blame abuse o women, chiding them tha they would not have been had they been a better wi

We have refuges, helpli and networks of support. although there are countl women in Scotland still trapped in the hell of dome abuse, help is there if they can find a way to reach it

Talking to Loat, I’m stru by my Western privilege a a frustration that for her there is no road map with freedom at its end.

She said: “I have though leaving but there is nowh to go and my children nee father. I feel ashamed tha is what he is. Sometimes think I can no longer bear

Loat has two girls, aged and 12, and a boy of five. When their son was six months old, Lip attacked