Record pets.

Barking up the wrong tree with your bad attitudes

SO I am dropping the car off for a 50,000-mile service and all I said was: “There’s a funny noise coming from the brakes and a knocking sound at the front right side when I go round a corner.”

I was met by a silent, stony stare from the mechanic.

Now I don’t know an awful lot about cars but I would have thought that anyone that did would have had a good idea what was wrong, so I was confused by his obvious belligerence.

Bewildered, I presumed he would have been happy to have the additional work. But there you go. Next, I headed off to the dentist for my regular six monthly check-up.

All I said was: “Can you take that loose crown out and fix it please and can I chat to you about dental implants? How painful they might be? How much they cost? And how long it takes to do them and can you show me the last X-rays you took to see if an implant

BY NEIL McINTOSH might impinge on my frontal sinus?”

I was met with a big sigh and a little eye rolling. What, on earth, was everyone’s problem?

The following day, back at work, I looked down at a packed operations list and wondered how on Earth we were ever going to get it finished.

Already, I could see no chance for a tea break and lunch wasn’t looking very promising either.

By coincidence, first in was my mechanic friend who had booked his elderly labrador to be spayed.

With a smile that was in

December 21  Carluke & District Canine Society’s Open Show in Lanark Agricultural Centre at 9.30am complete contrast to his blank expression the previous day, he nodded and said: “While she is under, could you give her teeth a wee clean and whip off that ugly lump under her chin?”

He was met, momentarily, by a silent, stony stare as I computed his question.

Scale and polish teeth equals minimum half hour. Minor lump removal, by the time it is clipped, cleaned, draped and surgically excised, equals half an hour. Lunchtime gone. Next in, by coincidence, was my dentist, who had booked her spaniel in for some tooth extractions. She grinned too. “While he is under the anaesthetic, could you clip his hairy feet, clean his ears, empty his anal glands and remove the wart on his forehead?”

I supressed the eye rolling but I am pretty sure my sigh was audible.

I guess some might say it was Karma but I hope it is also food for thought.