Gordhelp’em

Raging TV chef uses video platform to roast amateurs

GORDON Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares are back – and this time they’re only 15 seconds long.

The permanently furious chef has discovered TikTok and is using the video platform to roast amateur cooks.

On Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares in the UK and the US, he spent a week at a failing restaurant and showed the owner how to turn it from zero to hero.

It was tough love delivered with a foul mouth, as he explained that customers did not want raw scallops with chocolate sauce on a hot day in Spain.

When a vegetarian restaurant served him a fritter he described as “a giant turd”, they couldn’t have thought it could get worse. It did – turns out the offending fried object contained meat.

The last UK series of Kitchen Nightmares was in 2007, while in the US it ran until 2014.

Now he’s using bite-size videos to put online cooks in their place. And, as usual, he does not mince his words.

His first victim, jchelle63, from North Carolina, tries to make British fish and chips – and Ramsay is not having it.

She finds a dead fish, which she calls a cod, lying on the beach (It is definitely not a cod). Ramsay’s temperature rises as she makes flabby batter with flour, a whole egg, sugar and root beer. As she stirs the hefty paste, he comments: “Puke.”

And when she puts the battered fish in the microwave for 20 minutes, his eyebrows are up as high as his hairline. “Are you kidding me?” he seethes.

But after 12.4million people watched him give the cook an online doing, there were plenty more volunteers. The internet’s kitchen wannabes started sending Ramsay their videos – and he was as good as his word.

Here are some of Ramsay’s New Kitchen Nightmares.

Mythicalkitchen’s ramen grilled cheese sandwich, made with instant noodles, white bread and cheese slices, isn’t a hit. Ramsay rages: “For frick’s sake. Ramen cheese on toast? I’d like to ram that somewhere.” Bakingthursdays’ Ramsay sponge cake hits the wrong target. “Stop it,” the chef shouts into his phone. “You’ve got the wrong Scot, that looks like Gerry Butler. Or my grandad, and he died 10 years ago.” ViralKyle is making a pizza topped with macaroni cheese and what look like miniature sausages. Ramsay is not impressed. “It’s not viral, it’s vile Kyle. You can’t spell.”

Grandadjoe1933, in cardigan and pinny, is doing a pretty good job of his bread and butter pudding. Until he forgets to glaze it with jam. But by Ramsay’s standards, Joe is a star pupil.

Buoyboys’ method for turning cheap steak into wagyu beef leaves him traumatised. The pair add gelatine and boil the meat in a bag before grilling it on the barbecue. Ramsay reckons: “It looks like my grandad’s colostomy bag.”

Maxthemeatguy’s smoked sausage version of beef Wellington gets some grudging approval. Until he insists on calling it a Wellington. “If that’s a Wellington, call me Jamie Oliver. That’s a posh sausage roll.”

Colincreates stuffs two bell peppers with mac and cheese, crumbs and deep fries them and eats both. Ramsay’s verdict: “Colin, you’re such a bellend.”