Nightly dose of Wally’s wearing
GOOD luck John Bishop. If it’s any consolation you can’t make The Nightly Show any worse.
Booking David Walliams as host was on a par with hiring Dot Cotton to drive the guest limos…and Crippen to serve the drinks.
The show was infantile, awkward, witless, and as funny as crime statistics – a master-class in how not to do a comedy talk-show.
Yet this format has run successfully on US TV for decades. All it needs is a host capable of 1) delivering one-liners, 2) reading the autocue without fluffing and 3) feigning interest in the guests.
Strike one, two, three…It’s no wonder Walliams lost viewers quicker than a Dianne Abbott strip-show.
The jokes were lame first-thought stuff, like tourists going to the moon? Let’s send Piers Morgan.
Old gags were gleefully recycled: “I’ve never gone home with an Oscar, although a couple of times I have gone home with a Filipe…”
And ITV paid seven writers for this? At least Rob Brydon and Email me at: garry.bushell@ dailystar.co.uk or write c/o Daily Star Sunday, 10 Lower Thames Street, London EC3R 6EN Nina Conti got laughs! It improved on Wednesday when they brought in Rob Colley but then he must’ve dropped off.
Naturally, Walliams made himself the centre of far too many gags, often wearing women’s clothes.
He is by far the ugliest man in a frock since Les Dawson who at least had the distinction of being a comedy genius.
In fairness, David did show a flicker of edge when he interrupted Kim Cattrall banging on about all things Scouse to ask: “Do you still live in Liverpool?” (She was three months old when she left).
But on Friday he didn’t ask Gavin Rossdale a single question.
How could ITV have watched the woeful Walliams & Friends and thought “yeah this is the guy we need to serve up cutting edge humour for £50k a night”? Talk about a wasted opportunity.
So many comedians could have made a go of this. Not least Paul O’Grady or the brilliantly inventive Craig Ferguson whose Late Late Show was a constant joy on US TV.
Sadly, ITV’s future bookings include Mel & Sue, Davina and Gordon Bloody Ramsay, suggesting they know as much about talk-shows as Roland Duchatelet does about football.
Why not give scheming Paula from The Replacement a try? At least then a useless TV executive might fall on his sword. Literally.
LENO and Letterman once ruled US late-night TV. Now Brits set the pace there – James Cordon and his glorious Carpool Karaoke, John Oliver with his indignant rants…we’re lumbered with Aussie dullard Adam Hills. CATASTROPHE, right…Julie Hesmondhalgh, Broadchurch…Inside No.9 – fiendishly funny…Harry Hill’s Alien Fun Capsule. DAVID Walliams, The Nightly Show – sh*te new low…Let’s Sing & Dance For Comic Relief – let’s not… Russell Grant – more ham than a hog farm. THE Last Leg’s unbearable smugness. Armand Leroi using flawed science to diss the Beatles (and punk). Corrie expecting us to be on Michelle’s side as she assaults Eva and smashes up t’Rovers. THEY had a pancake race on EastEnders, but who is Walford’s all-time biggest tosser? You decide! Send your votes marked Ian Beale Contest to the usual address… ONE renowned for speaking unintelligible garbage, the other’s a much-loved English comedian who worked with the Small Faces. Deep joy.