Latifah grabs an Equalizer

BLIMEY. The Equalizer has been reborn as hip-hop star Queen Latifah.

Either that or Edward Woodward is back from the dead with one hell of a makeover.

The format remains pretty much the same as it was in 1985. Our hero is an avenging angel standing up for the poor and oppressed on the mean streets of New York City.

Robert McCall was ex-FBI. Latifah’s Robyn McCall quit the CIA, disillusioned with black ops malarkey.

He put adverts in newspapers offering to “equalise” the odds for any poor sod up against wrong’uns, she reaches out via an online forum.

But where Robert was a lone wolf, Robyn has a Person Of Interest-style back-up team – a super-smart hacker and a sharp-shooting sidekick – plus a helpful ex-agency boss and a stroppy teenage daughter.

Rather than tell a simple story well, the scriptwriters over-spice it. Single mum Robyn chances upon a poor waitress who witnessed a murder and gets framed for it with deep-fake footage worthy of The Capture.

The bad guys are heartless dogs of war who work for an evil tech billionaire (space rocket pending) and waterboard our heroine.

Latifah has charisma and the odd nice line. Who are you, ask the scumbags she finds enjoying a spot of light torture? “Neighbourhood Watch,” Robyn replies.

We don’t get to see how she overpowers them, though… it’s like the makers have forgotten stunt doubles exist. And like Baptiste, she seems to get by on no apparent income.

You might wonder who the put-upon viewer can turn to for justice against TV’s endless lazy recycling…

But look on the bright side. If Latifah can be the Equalizer what’s to stop Rihanna becoming Rumpole Of The Bailey one day?

Or even Britney Spears in the role she was born for – The Prisoner.

FIVE shows that should be remade with the right cast and writers: Sharpe, Hornblower, The Fear, Danger Man and Adam Adamant Lives!