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MY husband is a real hands-on dad. He adores our kids.

They can do nothing wrong in his eyes and he spends all of his spare time and attention on them, which is great.

But I never get a look-in.

If I suggest a romantic night out or dirty weekend away he looks at me as if I’m mad and asks: “What, without the kids?”

The only person who has ever babysat for them is his mum – once, when we went to a wedding.

Even then he insisted on driving back over 100 miles at 2am to be home when they woke up.

I’m left feeling lonely. How do I stop feeling under-valued?

JANE SAYS: You can’t allow yourself to be left on the sidelines.

Every time your husband and children pull on their coats, then pull on yours, too.

Go with them everywhere and be a part of the family.

Then, when you and your husband are having a coffee or sitting watching them play, you can start talking again.

Your babies aren’t going to be young for ever. In a few years they’ll want to start doing their own things with their friends.

It’s vital that you reconnect with your husband for the sake of your relationship.

Make it clear you’re not prepared to give up on this marriage, but you are prepared to fight for recognition and respect.

Assert yourself because balance is required here.