Dp ]\ccX _Xj k_\ ]Xd`cp ]ifd _\cc
@ËM< ?8; <EFL>? F= A@9<J
I CLASH with my bloke’s appalling low-life family all the time.
I just can’t stand them. They’re the rudest, roughest bunch I’ve ever had the misfortune to meet.
His parents resent me for taking their precious boy away from them. They think I’m snobby and stuck up, which is just not true.
His brother is a crook, while his three sisters are like the witches from Macbeth.
They’re always gossiping and stirring up trouble. The eldest one, in particular, considers herself my sworn enemy and never misses a chance to put me down.
She’s jealous of our house, my clothes and my parents’ money.
Friction
His mum has no on/off button and spouts the most unbelievably cruel stuff without batting an eyelid.
She and I last spoke at Easter when she turned up at our house unannounced and went crazy because my mum and dad were enjoying lunch in the garden.
She demanded to know why she hadn’t been invited and smashed a mug in anger. My bloke and I now have a little girl and I just don’t want her having anything to do with any of them.
Unfortunately this is leading to friction between my man and myself because he keeps begging me to give his folks a second chance.
My bloke isn’t a monster. He says he understands, but he still wants his girl to have a relationship with his family from hell.
My parents are thinking of relocating to the south coast and keep saying it would be wonderful if we were to move down with them for a fresh start.
I’m so tempted it’s untrue. We could get a massive place down there and have my parents on hand to babysit for free.
Is this the moment I put my foot down and demand my bloke does as he is told?
JANE SAYS: How is your man ever going to agree to a big move?
Surely you have to consider his feelings too? The fact is your child is 50% him. If he wants his daughter to have a relationship with his grandparents, aunts and uncles, you can’t stand in the way.
Maybe these people aren’t perfect, but are you? Is every single member of your family a living saint? Of course not.
In most relationships we don’t simply link up with a serious lover – we tend to join a whole family.
Whether that’s for better or worse is a matter of luck.
I understand that your outlaws drive you nuts, but you have to remember that they are your man’s flesh and blood.
You may find them crass and annoying, but he loves them and he wants you to embrace them too.
I’m sure that he’s acutely aware of all their faults, but that doesn’t change anything.
Can’t you sacrifice one day, once a month, just to make him proud?
Grit your teeth, put on your best smile and keep an open mind. You never know, they might all be on their best behaviour and you might enjoy yourself.
At the very least you’ll have done your bit. After that, you can do whatever you like.
Don’t make enemies because life is just too short.