Pf$pf cfm\i _Xj ile flk f] k`d\
EFN @KËJ DP KLIE KF N8CB
MY partner keeps leaving me. Any time the going get tough he legs it.
In the six years we’ve been together he’s walked out of hotel rooms, restaurants and parties.
Once, we were sitting by a pool in Spain. He got angry when I asked him for a drink. He said I was greedy and that he was sick of running around after me.
He said he was going back to the room for a rest.
I carried on sunbathing and eventually went in for a shower only to find he’d packed his stuff and left for the airport.
When I finally got home two days later a note stuck on the fridge informed me he had rekindled a relationship with an old girlfriend who understood him.
Tempted
I did nothing more but sit and wait. Sure enough, two weeks later he was back with his tail between his legs as if nothing had happened.
That was two years ago. Since then he’s skipped out half a dozen times or more and now I’m just about up to my limit.
What really upsets me is he never gives me details about what he did during his time away.
Meanwhile, my boss has announced he’s moving our firm to a different part of the country.
If I leave, then I’ll receive a basic redundancy package. But if I move with him, then I’ll get a promotion and a pay rise.
For once in my life I’m sorely tempted to do something completely different. If I relocate, then I’ll be going on my own and leaving my fickle partner behind.
Needless to say he’s begging me not to abandon him. He promises he can change and that he’ll never hurt or let me down again.
But maybe he would say that when he earns peanuts and I’m the main breadwinner?
What do I do for the best when I have very little self-worth and I’m scared to death about being on my own and starting again? JANE SAYS: The reality is that you’re already on your own.
Sadly, you can’t trust your partner to stay in the same place for more than 10 minutes at a time.
He’s so highly strung that it only takes the slightest provocation for him to take offence and stomp off. In the six years you’ve been together you’ve never been able to rely on him, so why not take that promotion and start a new and exciting life?
Isn’t it time that your needs and ambitions were put first for a change? I get the impression that you’ve been running around after this man for too long.
He isn’t capable of acting like a grown-up, earning a decent wage or making you content. Is he able to change the habits of a lifetime? I very much doubt it.
So far, all he’s ever done when faced with a problem is run for the hills. And, the very fact that he refuses to talk about his absences or the impact they have on you is very worrying indeed.
Of course, I get it that some people battle with everyday life, take flight when things get on top of them and struggle to explain how they feel.
But as he’s never tried to meet you halfway, you’ve already put up with enough and deserve better.