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ONE of the key differences between CELEBRITY MASTERCHEF (9pm, BBC One) and other versions of the show is its contestants can sometimes be clueless at the start.
To get onto the celeb version, being able to actually cook is not, it seems, a key requirement. Not to begin with.
By the semi-finals, however, which is where we’re at tonight, the dozier ones are long gone, right?
So we’re not likely to be left with someone who can’t, for example, tell the difference between a chicken and a shoulder of lamb.
Or are we? Don’t forget: Joey Essex is still in the competition…
The other eight remaining in the running are Vicky Pattison, Neil Ruddock, Kellie Maloney, Dillian Whyte, Dom Parker, Jenny Ryan and Greg Rutherford.
Tonight’s first task? To make lunch for 100 members of Kent’s coastguard staff. While stood on the White Cliffs of Dover, naturally.
Joey’s none too pleased when asked to trim a pile of Dover sole. “Me and fish don’t get on,” he protests. I must say this surprises me.
Elsewhere, Channel 5 has a new Aussie mini-series called THE HUNTING (10pm), going out nightly from now until Thursday. It revolves around a group of Adelaide school students and the explosive consequences of them sharing explicit photos online.
Meanwhile, in the last-but-one episode of A CONFESSION (9pm, ITV), Martin Freeman’s DS Steve Fulcher may have secured a confession but his bending of the rules to do so is about to have grim repercussions.