My girl treats me like her sex slave
SHE MAY DUMP ME IF I STOP
MY girlfriend loves watching me having sex with other women.
That may seem like a dream ticket, but I feel under pressure to titillate and amuse.
It’s got to the point where she sits on the sidelines shouting “More effort” and “Give me the sex face” as I struggle to perform.
If I’m honest, she views sex more as a spectator than a participant sport as she’s not that keen on the act herself. She’s far happier with a sex toy.
The last time we actually made love was last June and I could tell that she was simply going through the motions.
The way we operate as a couple is that we cruise the internet for like-minded swingers.
Sickening
Sometimes we invite a couple of women and I conduct a threesome. We’ve had married couples turn up, but as my girl isn’t into other men, she sits them down with a cup of tea instead.
I used to imagine that having sex with another man’s wife would be fun, but it’s bit like bingeing in a sweet shop; after a while it’s pretty sickening having too much of a good thing.
I live my life on the edge because I know she expects ever more interesting thrills and spectacles. I suspect that she will dump me if I ever finally say that I want it to stop. But there is a limit to the number of little blue pills I can pop and the faked enthusiasm I can muster.
Recently we rented a cottage and invited our regular swingers over. It should have been fun, but I just felt ridiculed and used.
My girl took pictures and filmed the action, but I look dead behind the eyes in every shot.
What have I become? How have I allowed my strings to be pulled like a performing puppet?
My girl has never said she loves me and I’m not even sure she does.
JANE SAYS: You paint a nightmarish scene. Far from being risqué and fun, your sex life sounds regimented and cold.
From what I understand, your girlfriend now sits barking orders at you like a maniacal film director.
You cannot even draw breath without her critiquing your moves.
Did she mention this fetish of hers when you first got together? Did you realise you’d be sleeping with other women for her delectation?
Talk to her away from the bedroom and make it clear that you have gone about as far as you can go with this carry on.
You need to start being true to yourself and your needs. She has to understand that this is not the kind of life you wish to lead.
Tell her that you crave a more regular, loving, mutually respectful union.
Is she interested in getting back to basics and starting again as a monogamous, dedicated couple?
You need to start to make plans to leave now before your self-worth takes any more of a battering.
MY teenage nephew is vile. He’s sulky and rude and never stops looking at his phone.
It’s my sister’s turn to host Christmas but she’s asked me to host as she’s tired and broke.
I don’t mind feeding her and her daughter (18) but her son (16) makes my hackles rise. He burps, passes wind and grunts and has never once said “thank you” for anything.
Last Christmas it was like having a giant sloth at the table. I feel sorry for my sister because I know she struggles with him, but why is my day always ruined?
JANE SAYS: You can hardly insist the lad stays at home at this late stage.
He may be uncommunicative and unhappy precisely because your sister has such a tough time.
Could you ban phones and involve him in helping out?
Look him in the eye and talk to him.
It could be that he enjoys the day more than you’ll ever know.
He may be self-conscious and struggle to express thanks or happiness, but you may find he actually appreciates your efforts.