COMING SOON
A LAST HURRAH FOR THE REBELS Sorry, you’ve lost all those loving felines
STAR WARS: THE RISE OF SKYWALKER (12A)
AFTER 42 years, Disney has carefully steered the final episode in a trilogy of Star Wars trilogies into cinemas.
The Rise of Skywalker is another brutally efficient movie from this galaxy’s most successful studio.
Director Rian Johnson’s previous formula-bending instalment went down well with critics but seemed to upset the type of fan who has a Wookiee mask high on their Christmas lists.
So this time, JJ Abrams (who also directed The Force Awakens) has avoided every pot hole and made sure he’s checked his rearview mirror manoeuvre.
His slick finale gives die-hard fans all the retro thrills they’ve ever dreamed of.
There are curtain calls for old favourites (even the dead ones), laser fights with wonky-shooting stormtroopers and slick aerial dogfights set to the rousing sound of John Williams’ legendary score.
Ian McDiarmid is back as Emperor Palpatine, Mark Hamill returns as Luke Skywalker and the before every late Carrie Fisher has been digitally regenerated as General Leia.
“The dead speak!” begins the opening script, which goes on to relate how the evil Emperor has been trolling the galaxy with sinister messages.
As no-one can properly die in this universe – even actors – jeopardy isn’t high up on its list of priorities.
The plot (don’t worry, I shall tread carefully) sends Rey (Daisy Ridley), sensitive Finn (John Boyega) and daring Poe (Oscar Isaac) on a treasure hunt for a gadget that will lead them to the site of the final showdown.
Along the way, we get several psychic showdowns between Rey and Adam Driver’s Kylo Ren. The force is now so strong between these two they can swashbuckle in each other’s heads.
Their duels are nicely choreographed but a little repetitive. After a while, you wish they’d just get a room and set about taking over the galaxy. Still, there are some interesting elements.
The rebels reach the Forbidden Desert of Pasaana in carnival season, with cute elephant-like aliens dancing with their bigger and uglier parents.
The hunt then takes them to the remnants of the first Death Star which has crashed in an alien sea and is being lashed by giant waves.
There’s a Christmassy, Dickensian feel to the winding streets of the snow-flecked city of Kijimi, where Poe runs into an old flame.
The new characters are used sparingly. Lamp-headed droid D-0 has so little to do, he appears to have been built in the merchandising department.
But I did enjoy a squeaky alien engineer called Babu (Shirley Henderson).
Ridley definitely delivers as Rey too. As her character is now thoroughly in the grip of the Dark Side, the Brit has a lot more acting to do in this one.
It’s her torment that keeps us invested in Abrams’ slick but often soulless action scenes.
Episode IX won’t upset anyone but I can’t see many people watching it in 42 years’ time. little Frik and Emma
NEXT WEEK: Saoirse Ronan Watson lead an all-star cast in Little of
Women, a sumptuous adaptation novelist Louisa May Alcott’s American Civil War saga. goes
THE WEEK AFTER: Guy Ritchie back to his roots with The Gentlemen,a Grant British gangster film starring Hugh and Matthew McConaughey. the scene where Idris Elba does a feline Full Monty on a glittering staircase.
To be fair, the performances aren’t the worst thing about this bizarre musical.
Ballerina Francesca Hayward makes a very graceful lead, Ian McKellen hams it up nicely, Taylor Swift can hold a tune and James Corden isn’t annoying.
What really drags this into the litter tray is the horrible CGI.
Cats The Movie needs to be put down.