Ex ran off but now he wants me back FELLA IS MISSING THE SEX
MY boyfriend spent the whole period from March to September locked down with a sexy neighbour.
He literally packed his bags and did a midnight flit the minute my back was turned.
I endured six, lonely months on my own feeling humiliated. He didn’t bother to ring or text me once – not even to ask how our three dogs were doing.
The neighbour finally saw him for what he really is ( selfish, lazy and not very good in bed) and threw him out. He’s been crashing with his parents ever since.
Now, inevitably, he’s asking if we can try again. He says he has a job and steady income and that I “owe” him a second chance as I cheated on him in 2018 with my ex and he forgave that.
Satisfy
But I only slept with my ex twice over a drunken, lost weekend.
He honestly thinks we can carry on as before and that I’m being small- minded for denying him his “rightful” place in our bed. He’s missing sex and thinks it’s my responsibility to satisfy him.
And he says his parents are always poking their noses into his business.
Most of my friends tell me I’d be crazy to have him back but my
mum keeps telling me to swallow my pride. She maintains that he’s the best man I’m ever going to meet and that I should count myself lucky that he wants to come back.
All she actually cares about is getting me off her hands and it hurts that she doesn’t care about my feelings or my self- respect any more than my ex does.
How come I’m surrounded by morons?
JANE SAYS: It’s your life and you cannot allow yourself to be controlled or swayed by your mother or ex- partner.
I’m sure it would suit them
both very well for you to roll over and do as you’re told – but why should you?
Recent events must have shown you that you can manage perfectly well without your ex in your face and your mother constantly telling you what to do with your life.
Do not allow yourself to be manipulated by people who are determined to put you in a box. The fact your ex- partner ran off with a neighbour the minute lockdown was announced speaks volumes.
If he finds himself at a loose end now, well that’s just too bad. You owe him
nothing and he has no right to drag up past mistakes in an effort to emotionally blackmail and shame you.
Wish him well with his new job but insist he doesn’t contact you again. He made his decision last March and it’s not your fault that things didn’t work out for him.
If things are tough under his parents’ roof, then that’s something he needs to work out with them.
The reality is that you know he is a user. He doesn’t love you, only what comforts you can offer him – and that’s not good enough.