Kill suspect on bad day
IS there any wonder policing is so bad in the States? Last week a top Georgia officer told how a suspected mass killer who shot dead eight people – six of whom were Asian women – did so not because of their race but because he said he was having a “bad day”.
Although the suspect denied race was a factor, hate crimes against Asian-americans have spiked recently, fuelled by rhetoric that blames them for the spread of Covid-19.
When I have a bad day, I tend to devour a full tub of ice cream or a bag of Doritos.
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A FLORIDA woman has been charged with practising medicine without a license after posing as a plastic surgeon and botching a man’s nose job. Alcalira Jimenez De Rodriguez, left, was in the middle of performing a procedure when police swooped. What with providing false noses and stringing people along, the 56-year-old is like a modern-day Pinocchio.
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AN advert on New York’s classified ad site Craigslist this week was from someone asking for help to bury their mother in a “gangsterthemed” send-off as she was Italian.
It read: “Muscle men to carry my mother. No pay. My mom is dead. She wanted to be cremated (sic) but the guy who burns bodies say she’s too fat to get on fire.
“I am looking for six athletic male models to carry my mom into the church. Must have sixpacks and bring your own fedoras.”
His mum will be proud.
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WHEN theme parks open, plans are afoot to prevent thrill-seekers from spreading Covid.
Trade group California Attractions and Parks Association is backing a move to stop rollercoaster riders from screaming out.
“Face covering usage and/or modifications to seat loading patterns will be required on amusement park rides to mitigate the effects of shouting,” they said.
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BOOKWORM Betty Diamond proved she was a real gem after donating £360 to a New York library. The 74-yearold, of Madison, Wisconsin, tried to atone after failing to return a book. Betty had checked out Ol’ Paul, the Mighty Logger in 1957 and forgot to hand it back.
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AND FINALLY...
TENTATIVE steps are being taken in New York to reopen businesses. When I asked my barman Richard what it is he’s missed the most, he said: “The teamwork” before adding: “It helps to put the blame on someone else.”